Life As Planned
by Mere Anarchy
Summary: Life, Sakura mused, did not always go as planned. Sometimes it went much, much worse.


Life, Sakura mused, did not always go as planned. Sometimes it went much, much worse. She could remember a time she'd wanted to marry Uchiha Sasuke and spend the rest of her days raising his children. Now, dead tired and almost depleted of chakra, she realized that simply winning this fight would be enough.

She had to admit, though, even that goal seemed absurdly far-fetched. A girl of her caliber couldn't beat Hyuuga Neji. Hell, a girl of any caliber couldn't beat Hyuuga Neji.

_Now,_ Sakura thought as she barely dodged the man's fist, _maybe I'm being a little harsh on my sex. Surely _some_ woman could win against him. _

As Neji executed a series of kicks and punches that sent her flying backwards, this sentiment struck her as unlikely.

In an instant he was in front of her, eyebrows arched. He watched her struggle to stand for a moment before observing, "Perhaps I've been too hard on you. I just assumed that someone who has been training with Tsunade-sama for as long as you have would possess more _stamina_."

Even as she collapsed into a heap on the ground, the mocking tone wasn't lost on Sakura. A low growl made its indignant way up her throat at this injustice. They'd been at it for 3 hours, and he certainly wasn't going easy on her.

**_Or maybe he was,_** Inner Sakura sneered. **_Maybe you're just too weak to notice. _**

"Well, excuse me, _Hyuuga-sama_, for disappointing you so severely." Sakura snapped at him from her position on the soil. "If I'm as pathetic as you seem to think, maybe we're wasting our time."

There was no response for a moment, and Sakura winced as she realized how rude she sounded. Neji hadn't been required to help her– but then, it wasn't like he'd volunteered, either. The kunoichi couldn't help but snigger as she recalled the look on his face when Tsunade had asked him to spar with Sakura while she was away.

"_You want me to. . . what?"_

"_Really, Neji, is it that hard of a concept? All I ask is that you train with Sakura-chan while I'm busy with diplomatic matters in Suna. I need _someone _to make sure she stays on pace, and who's better cut out for that job than you?"_

_Here the shinobi had tried to cut in, but the Godaime continued smoothly, "You've just finished a slew of missions, so you deserve to stay home and rest. For now, Konoha isn't in any danger so we don't particularly require your. . . skills. Plus, you should be honored that I consider you worthy of training my precious apprentice."_

_At this point, Neji looked slightly furious. "First of all, I do not require 'rest'. Second, as a top ANBU member, I do not have time to waste on weaklings like Haruno! I should be putting my talents to use in the field!"_

_Both Sakura and Tsunade's eyes widened at the bit about the 'weakling' bit. Before her student could maim the unfortunate shinobi, the Godaime demanded, "Are you questioning my judgement, Hyuuga? Starting tomorrow, like it or not, you will be training with Sakura. Am I understood?"_

At this point, the Hyuuga prodigy had no choice but to relent. And despite being angry at him for underestimating her, Sakura was pleased that she would be training with such a reputable ninja.

But now, what with the taunting and thorough beating, he hadn't just stepped on her pride– he'd picked it up and stretched it out and shoved it into the path of an oncoming elephant stampede.

Hell would freeze over before she let him do it again.

"Allow me to remind you, Haruno," Neji said icily, snapping her out of her reverie. "I didn't exactly bang on the Godaime's door, begging to baby-sit you. Now, are you going to get up or proceed with, as you so eloquently put it, 'wasting our time'?"

Sakura struggled onto her knees, glaring at the Hyuuga prodigy. There was a gleam in her eyes Neji couldn't quite place, and therefore didn't like. "I'll get up. But first let's make a little deal, shall we?"

He raised a chocolate eyebrow, not sure what to make of her newly developed haughtiness, but nodded all the same.

"I beat you in a contest of my choice, and you can't say anything sarcastic for the whole day."

By now both of his eyebrows were raised. "And if I win?"

"You don't have to 'baby-sit' me, _as you so eloquently put it_, for the rest of this week."

There was no hesitation in his voice, no glimmer of doubt in his eyes as he agreed to her terms. Little did the unsuspecting male know, Sakura would reach deep into the veiled mysteries of womanhood to produce a challenge so difficult even the handsomest of men could not pull it off: Ask a Kunoichi If She's On Her Period.

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Sakura smirked as Neji finished carefully applying Aloe Vera to a red mark that vaguely resembled a feminine hand on his cheek. "You should really let me heal that," she said, not bothering to hide the smugness in her voice. The brown-haired shinobi openly scowled at her, but said not a word.

Life, Sakura mused laughingly, did not always go as planned. Sometimes it went much, much better.

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A/N: And that, my friends, is what happens when I try to be serious. I'm not joking- I started writing this one-shot with every intention of making it a multi-chapter angsty romance. You can see how well _that_ little plan turned out.

Anyway, reviews are much appreciated, seeing as I'm ADDICTED TO THEM, but whatever. It's not like I'M BEGGING, or anything. whistles innocently Oh, and by the way, I KNOW that this story is stupid, but your telling me that will only drag me into a depression so deep it's like the depth of a thousand oceans! Combined! (In other words, no flames.)

-Mere Anarchy


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